**For entertainment only, all characters and events are fictional and not related to any real person, place or situation that have ever existed in the real world**
็Happy Halloween! :) ;} ;P
Bangkok ... A city where you'll have the most alien encounters in the world. I'm Nelson Howe, professor of Philosophy in New York. I lived in Bangkok for 3 years. And this is the story of my first time in Bangkok!
Salmon : Why are you so interested about Thai ghosts?
Nelson : Basically, I'm a big fan of supernatural stuff myself. When I came here, I wondered how is the surreal ghost conceived in a surreal place like Thailand.
Salmon : Where di you first learn about Thai ghosts? Movie?
Nelson : Not really. I started from the five-baht-ghost-comic. It was very cheap and very addictive. The story is so fast pace and so driving. You will see people die in almost every episode. Moreover, the motivation of killing is so simple. Sometimes you will see a guying peeing on a big tree then suddenly he's choked to death. It is so surreal than even a comic of Joan Cornella can't compare with it. Another thing that I like about five-baht-ghost-comic is that you can still find traditional ghost stories there. But you would barely find them among Thai horror film these days. The ghosts there are mostly contemporary or modernized.
Salmon : What do you think about traditional Thai ghosts?
Nelson : Way cooler than western ghosts I've ever known. The first Thai ghost I gotta know is "Krahang". I was stunned by his visual impact. He wore traditional Thai costume. He went topless to show his six-pack. And you know what ... he can even fly by using kitchen utensils!
Salmon : OK .. now let's talk about your favorite Thai ghost
Nelson : I like "Krasue" the most because she breaks all rules and logic created by humans. I mean Krahang still follow physically rules by flying with wings. "Pred" voice is high because of its needle-size mouth which is anatomically correct. But Krasue breaks all that logic. She can take her head and her internal organism off her body so safely that even MIT has taken her as case study. Her intestine glows in the dark for a long time without using any energy. This is the biological advance that even NASA can only dream about. The best part is she doesn't need any aerodynamic power to fly. I have never experienced anything like this. In the aviation history, I could say she is one of the greatest achievement just like the Wright's brother airplane and Yuri Gagarin's Vostok spaceship.
Salmon : Impressive!
Nelson : Her magnificent goes even further. Not only for science, she's also beyond any psychological explanation.
Salmon : How?
Nelson : Just think about it. If I had her power, flying with light weight, night vision eyes and no fuel needed. I would fly over the world like crazy. I would fly over lavender field in Hokkaido. I would fly to see the northern light in Alaska. But Krasue doesn't care about this. As soon as she flies off her body, she goes straight to eat shit! I mean .. this is so unpredictable. Why don't she just walk to the toilet and eat while she is a human? You doesn't need any superhuman power to do it. Remember when spiderman said "great power comes with great responsibility". Krasue said "f*ck you spiderman! I'm just gonna eat shit!".
Salmon : So ... have you ever really met Thai ghosts?
Nelson : I already did.
Salmon : Tell us ..
Nelson : Last year, I came here for a small vacation. I had a chance to stay in a small hotel in a rural area. I woke up at night for an unknown reason. Then I saw her standing there at the end of the bed. At that moment, I felt so disappointed.
Salmon : Oh ... why?
Nelson : She wasn't like Thai traditional ghosts I had studied. She came in a very contemporary form. White cloth, pale skin, long hair. I knew Thai people went crazy about Japanese or Korean culture. But I didn't know that Thai ghosts would be the same.
Salmon : Hey .. it's a ghost! Aren't you going to freak out?
Nelson : So what? ... actually I was very happy. Let me tell you something. If you're still young, you might feel that ghosts are scary. But for an old man at the age of eighty like me, seeing ghosts is like watching a trailer of my future life.
===Back to the hotel===
Nelson : I was so happy at that moment. She was a bit confused when she saw me acting like that. Then she started saying with a ghost's voice ..
Thai ghost : Chuay Duay! Chuay Duay!
Nelson : Could you speak English? Coz my Thai is not strong.
Thai ghost : Help me. I was here ... umm ... I have been here for long time.
Nelson : Calm down, sweetie. You're only a ghost. Don't worry about "present perfect" tense. I'd love to hear you.Your mis-grammar is ok. Come here. Tell me about your self ..
Nelson : The she smiled and become more casual. She started telling how she ended her life there and other stuff. I told her "I'm sorry for her loss" and asked if I could help her in any way. She told me to make merit or pour any holy water for her. After I said "OK", she gave me the last smile and said "Thank you so much" and disappeared.
===Back to the studio==
Salmon : So how'd you feel after that?
Nelson : I want to suggest something to Thai ghosts out there. If you were a ghost who'd like to have some merit, first thing to do is you should change a way of approaching your target. If you want to haunt your specific target for vengeance, that's fine. But fior a stranger like my case, I would prefer a better manner. Instead of haunting them, you should do Q&A with them. Just think about it. You're a ghost. You have supernatural power! You know several things that human don't. We also have many things we want to ask you! Such as .. what's the next winning lottery number? Do heaven and hell exist? Where are aliens in our galaxy? etc.
Salmon : OK .. OK ... Get it
Nelson : As you see, we have so many questions to ask. You just need to appear nicely. And tell your target about your exchange rate. For example, one question for prayer or two questions for meditation and giving to the monk depends on the weight of the question. Just do it this way and you will succeed. Remember, you're a ghost in modern time. Don't be stupid!
Salmon : Have you ever seen a ghost since then?
Nelson : Well, I invited her here.
Salmon : Shit!
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The end :)